You Can't Hold Me Back

Like so many new songs I've discovered I found this little gem on Spotify.  While these beautiful ladies are not new comers by any stretch, they are new to me.  Sweethearts of the Rodeo are two sisters, Janis Oliver and Kristine Arnold and they debuted in 1986 with Hey Doll Baby.  Their last record was released 17 years ago because they chose to put their career on hold while they raised their families and enjoyed their lives.

I absolutely love You Can't Hold Me Back!  So many women settle for a lesser love all in the name of fulfilling "the dream" but end up unhappy and ultimately unfulfilled.  I had what I thought was the ultimate love but if I were still in that relationship I wouldn't be where I am today.  I wouldn't have had the chance to learn how to cut meat, or a few extra years spent with my family.  I certainly wouldn't be about to move several states away for work.  I would have graduated on time but in doing so have missed out on all of the great things I've done in that time period.  Even though I try my best to keep attention off of me I tend to stand out.  Whether it be my loud voice, infectious laugh or the fact that I fall a lot, somehow I end up sticking out in a crowd.  "Because I'm a white rose blooming in a field of red".  Isn't that such a fantastic line?  I apologize for not being able to find the lyrics but here's a video of them singing live, so I hope you enjoy.  Check out their CD Restless I think it's a good one. 

XO Loves,

Me

A Feelin' Like That

Gary Allan.  What can I say, I love his music.  I love his voice and his songs have a way of really touching home.  When this song first came out I couldn't get enough of it.  Don't you know it was my ringtone!  I listened to it all the time, such a fantastic song.  Then life went along and I didn't hear it on the radio anymore and I kind of forgot about it, until it popped up on Spotify.  It was as if my love affair started completely anew.  I've been a touch lax lately on my Song of the Week posts, so what a better way to start again than with a long lost fav.  So here you are my pretties, Gary Allan's A Feelin' Like That.

I stepped out into the blue
Felt the wind hit my face
Before my shoot opened I felt my heart race
I was fallin
Oh that's just fallin

Off the coast of Australia
I dove way down deep
For all that I saw of that Great Barrier Reef
It was nothin
Compared to you it was nothin

[Chorus]
I got Lightning in my veins
thunder in my chest.
all tangled up with you and tryin to catch my breath
I've been chasing that sensation half way
around the world and lookin' back
on what we had.
I've done it all I've seen it all but I can't find a feelin' like that.


I wound up in some town in Spain
runnin with the bulls
Tryin to catch another thrill with a thousand other fools
We were runnin
Ah but that's just runnin
when I started pushin 30
it started pushin back
Well how was I to know till now you'd be such a hard act to follow
Nothin seems to follow

[chorus]
I got Lightning in my veins
thunder in my chest.
all tangled up with you and tryin to catch my breath
I've been chasing that sensation half way
around the world and lookin' back
on what we had.
I've done it all I've seen it all but I can't find a feelin' like that.

It's like flyin down some back road at midnight
with you eyes closed and the head lights off
Your life is searchin everywhere can't find that feelin' anywhere
Your all I want, now all I want is that...

Lightning in my veins
thunder in my chest.
all tangled up with you and tryin to catch my breath
I've been chasing that sensation half way
around the world and lookin back
on what we have.
I've done it all I've seen it all but I can't find a feelin' like that.

That's right I've done it all
I've seen it all but I can't find a feelin' like that



XO Loves,

Me

A Rainy Day at Home

Today I cried a little.  I hate that I can be so emotional, I've always felt it was a complete setback.  Some may agree it is, others may think it's endearing while others still just don't understand it.  I find myself on the verge of tears whenever something touches my heart.  Whether it be a touching movie, talking about a lost pet, a lost friend or just my family in general I find myself literally getting choked up over nothing.  I didn't used to be this way.  In fact as a child I remember rarely crying at funerals of beloved family members.  It's as though all those emotionless years are now catching up with me and making up for lost time. 

I felt like crap today.  It was similar to a wicked hangover only without the nausea, I couldn't breathe and it felt like an elephant had taken up residence on my chest.  All I wanted was my mum's.  I laid pathetically in my bed just about all day, getting up only to let my dogs out.  Finally I decided I needed to eat so I left home in search of sustenance.  I just wanted to listen to my music loud and as La Roux blasted through my speakers I couldn't help but think about another time.  A little over a year ago when her CD was all I listened to as I mourned the loss of my best friend.  I'm not sure why out of all of the CD's I have in my pickup her's was the one I chose, there was no meaning behind it, we'd never listened to it.  In fact he probably wouldn't have even liked her.  Two years ago I chose to come back to school and finish my degree.  The loss of my best friend felt even greater as I came back to his old stomping grounds. 

He was a great guy.  One of the first friend's I made when I started college.  He had the best parties and they were known as such far and wide.  He was always there for me, through the dark and the light.  Whether I needed an encouraging word, a drive in the mountains or a beer he was always there somehow knowing exactly what I needed.  He occasionally lost his way over the years, but he had a good heart and always found his way back.  The hardest part about crying over him is that if only he were still here he's the first one I'd call to help stop this nonsense.  His death was untimely of course and I haven't dealt well even though it's been two years.  I still clearly remember the day my friend called to tell me he was gone.  I had moved home and we hadn't talked in awhile I'd been thinking about giving him a call to catch up.  The opportunity lost and I couldn't even attend his funeral.  I never got to say good-bye to the one man I had a truly uncomplicated relationship with.  He was laid to rest in ancestral lands and I'm bound and determined to say good-bye to him before I leave in June.  Visiting his grave will be incredibly real and even though I know he's gone that cold gray stone will drive it home.  I've lost a lot of family, people I loved and cherished for years but for some reason I felt his death much stronger than any other.  He was my go to guy, my problem solver, my good time friend.  He was a colorful man and touched so many lives, my heart breaks for the three little kids he left behind.  So many memories, so many crazy stories, so many good times.  I hope he knows how truly special he was and always will be to me. 

XO Loves,

Me