Utah--California

If you've kept up with my blog at all that means more than likely you've read at least one post about going home.  I know what you're thinking, "get some new material", but what you should be thinking is how important my home must be to me.  I'd have to be heartless for a place where my family has such deep roots to mean nothing to me.  My dad once told me early on in my college career that no matter where life took me the ranch would always be my home, it would always mean something and it would always be there waiting.  That's stayed with me and there have been times over the last decade that I've needed to go home to center myself.  To again get a hold on who I am, to just be me.

As per my gypsy lifestyle it's once again time to head home.  My job is done for the season and since everything I own is in a storage unit and I technically no longer have a place of residence, I might as well go to California.  This summer has been challenging, I've had to sit by and listen as my parents place was threatened by not one but two wildfires.  More recently however, a shed burned down at the house and everything was almost lost.  If it hadn't been for a water pumper left over from the wildfire threat and the help of many neighbors we would have lost everything.  There wouldn't have been anything left to go back to. 

If you know me, you know that fire is the #1 thing I'm afraid of.  Growing up in a house made of nothing but wood, fire was always a threat and we were cautioned against that danger.  As a little girl I used to lay awake at night and plan for a fire.  If we got a flu fire, what would I do.  I would plan on grabbing a big garbage sack and filling it with my most prized possessions and then leaping out of my bedroom window.  Totally normal right?  That fear has very much followed me into adult hood.  Thankfully the house was saved but the shed and everything in it are forever lost.  My dad re-injured his shoulders during the fire and if there was ever any doubt I now know home is where I belong.

Since being put on a no work restriction at work for an injury I suffered in August I've had very little human contact.  I don't know many people in this town and without work that left me pretty isolated.  In just 3 short hours my cousin will be flying in.  The excitement is all but tangible at this point.  It's like waiting for Christmas.  I'm absolutely ecstatic!  It's been 11 months since I've been home, 5 months since I've seen my dogs, which has been really hard.  I also had to leave behind a couple horses that I also can't wait to get back and work with.  At this time in three days I will once again be hooked up and on the road home.  Both my cousin and I are now laid off so we're taking our time on this trip.  No harried, all-night driving to make it home on a deadline.  It'll be a blast as always.  Utah is even being so kind as to send me off with some snow.

Xo Loves,

Me

Tennessee Stud

This song is another great one.  I mean a horse the color of the sun And with green eyes?  Love it!  Many folks have sung this song over the years, Chris LeDoux, Johnny Cash, Doc Watson and Eddy Arnold.  Although the song was originally written by Jimmy Driftwood in the 60's.  I'm most accustomed to listening to Doc Watson's version, however, it was Eddy Arnold's version that made it famous.  So since I'm into showcasing the originals I'm going to share with you the original version HERE.  In my mind it's best to give credit where credit is truly due.  He may not have been a headliner in his day but he did become a member of the Grand Ol Opry in the 1950's.  Another little interesting fact, he actually wrote Johnny Horton's famous song "Battle of New Orleans".  He wrote it in 1936 in an effort to get the high school class he was teaching interested in the event.  So here it is, I hope you enjoy!

Tennessee Stud by Jimmy Driftwood

Along about eighteen twenty-five,
I left Tennessee very much alive.
I never would have got through the Arkansas mud
If I hadn't been a-ridin' on the Tennessee Stud.
I had some trouble with my sweetheart's pa,
And one of her brothers was a bad outlaw.
I sent her a letter by my Uncle Bud,
And I rode away on the Tennessee Stud.

The Tennessee Stud was long and lean,
The color of the sun, and his eyes were green.
He had the nerve and he had the blood,
And there never was a horse like the Tennessee Stud.
One day I was riding in a beautiful land
I run smack into an Indian band
They jumped their nags with a whoop and a yell
And away we rode like a bat out of hell.
I circled their camp for a time or two,
Just to show what a Tennessee horse can do.
The redskin boys couldn't get my blood,
'Cause I was a-riding on the Tennessee Stud.

We drifted on down into no man's land,
We crossed that river called the Rio Grande.
I raced my horse with the Spaniard's foal
'Til I got me a skin full of silver and gold.

Me and a gambler, we couldn't agree,
We got in a fight over Tennessee.
We jerked our guns, and he fell with a thud,
And I got away on the Tennessee Stud.

I got just as lonesome as a man can be,
Dreamin' of my girl in Tennessee.
The Tennessee Stud's green eyes turned blue
'Cause he was a-dreamin' of a sweetheart, too,

We loped right back across Arkansas;
I whupped her brother and I whupped her pa.
I found that girl with the golden hair,
And she was a-riding on the Tennessee Mare.

Stirrup to stirrup and side by side,
We crossed the mountains and the valleys wide.
We came to Big Muddy, then we forded the flood
On the Tennessee Mare and the Tennessee Stud.

A pretty little baby on the cabin floor,
A little horse colt playing 'round the door,
I love that girl with the golden hair,
And the Tennessee Stud loves the Tennessee Mare.

XO Loves,

Me

When the Fog Rolls In

Most people hate fog.  You can't see in it, it's cold, it's wet and damp, it's a nuisance.  But to me it's so much more.  It's my momma telling me stories about vampires and that when I see fog at night I shouldn't walk through it.  It's long road trips home through freezing fog making the trip all the more memorable.  It's cool, windy mornings hunting with my poppa. 

There's something unearthly about being above the fog when the sun rises.  A heavy gray layer that looks so dense you think you can walk on it.  Fog pretty much always reminds me of hunting season.  I remember one hunt in particular.  I had just turned 12 that summer, so this was my first trip hunting deer where I actually got to carry a rifle.  My poppa and I headed up the mountain long before the sun began to lighten the sky.  As black slowly turned into gray we were already headed to a bluff to wait for sunrise.  The fog was so thick you could only see about 6 feet around you.  It was just my poppa, me and our big dog.  The wind was howling and I was terribly cold.  My poppa tucked me down amongst some rocks and placed our dog and himself in front of me blocking most of the wind.  We couldn't see the sunrise, but it did eventually get light.  It was probably another hour before the fog finally lifted.  Only what it revealed wasn't what we expected at all.  Unbeknownst to us there were in fact several other hunters scattered around us.  Realizing that hunting there was futile we went searching elsewhere.  Cold weather and fog always bring those images to mind and I love it. 

Heavy fog at night or in the cold gray light of morning I can't help but remember the tales my momma used to spin.  She's a fantastic story teller, seriously the brother's Grimm have nothing on her.  Tales so ridiculous they were never believable, but told with such conviction that you had to wonder.  "Don't worry" she'd say, "I'll protect you".  Those pesky vamps, just wandering around in the fog looking for their next victim.

So as you can see I have fond memories circling fog.  I also find it quite peaceful.  There's something to be said for being blind to most of your surroundings. It's as though all of your senses kick into overdrive and you're more aware than ever.  It's rather pleasant if not a touch frightening as well.  What can I say though, I always did like a good thrill.

XO Loves,


Me 

Does he?

Does he remember her name?
Does he know the innocence he stole?
Does he ever think about the pain and fear he caused a girl that night?
It seems as though he's gone about his life without atoning for his greatest sin.
Every weekend it's a new rush in that arena, does he know what true fear feels like?
Does he ever wonder what happened to her, whether she was able to overcome the evil she faced that night?
Is she happy?
He paints a smile on his face for the big show, but does that mirth reach his soul?
Looking at his face on the computer, reading his name, the girls says, NO!
He didn't and still doesn't care.
He acted in the moment, going after what he wanted.
He's never apologized, never tried to make it right.
Maybe someday she'll be able to carry on as he does.
But she'll forever wonder if he remembers, if he feels, if he's sorry...

XO Loves,

Me

Mountains

I left the office mid-morning to do some range checks in the mountains.  My second day working solo and my first time to this allotment.  Little did I know I was in for a real treat.

I work in the forest everyday, but this wasn't typical country.  I was up over 10,000 feet and very near treeline.  Gamble Oak ceased to be the main vegetation cover and more and more fir's lined the road.  It was cool and the wind was blowing a fierce storm towards the peaks.  I had made a couple stops when I explored around a spring some.  I knew I was close to the point I needed to find, but I couldn't see it anywhere.  During said search I didn't feel like I was at work at all.  I wandered silently along a cow trail and spied a deer, I wasn't obtrusive in any way and even though it's bow season she didn't give a care.  I came upon a meadow, the grass was still wet with morning dew and it was wonderfully quiet.  Quiet in the way lonely mountains are.  There was no incessant babbling, no clomp of others footsteps, no roar of an engine.  There was just me in this calm and serene place, the only sound coming from the whispering of the wind through the quakies.  It did wonders for my soul!

I continued to climb into avalanche territory, which is just phenomenal to me.  There were several hunting camps along the way but the feel was just different.  The weather played a big role in this as well.  There's something fantastic about the calm before the storm.  The last place I checked was another meadow sloping down into a spring.  If I didn't turn around and look at the bald peak behind me I could almost imagine I was back home.  Walking around in country as familiar to me as any.  It was beautiful and the grass, oh the grass!  Who knew so much grass could grow in the South West?!

As I headed to my next point I came across a rancher on a big buckskin paint, his little Border Collie Pug right behind him.  I'd only met him once before but we had a nice chat, we left each other with well wishes and a hope of staying dry.  Less than 10 minutes later it started to sprinkle, followed by flashes of lightning.  I headed back to my pickup with no wish of being struck. My next route was a rough one, barely good enough to drive a pickup.  By the time I arrived the rain was coming down in torrents.  With my windows up the thunder still crashed with incredible sound.  I've never been that close to the sky when it broke open.  A part of me wished I didn't have such great cover, that I was out in the open and could really watch the show above.  It was magnificent and with wipers on high I reluctantly turned around and left.  I didn't feel confident enough to try and risk the road that appeared to be little more than a trail in such a storm. I can't wait to go back and finish.  Next time though I hope to check the last section a horseback.  To be able to ride in country such as that is a dream.

XO Loves,

Me

The Ballad of Ira Hays

This is one of Johnny Cash's songs from his album Bitter Tears that was released in 1964.  I've always really liked it, but it's not one you hear very often if at all.  Which is just my kind of song.  Ira Hays was one of five Marines and a Navy Corpsman who raised the flag on Mount Suribachi in WWII, only three of these men left that hill.  When I was 13 I had the fortune of seeing this bronze statue in Washington D.C.  Here's a great VIDEO of the song that also gives more information.

"The Ballad Of Ira Hayes"

Ira Hayes,
Ira Hayes

[CHORUS:]
Call him drunken Ira Hayes
He won't answer anymore
Not the whiskey drinkin' Indian
Nor the Marine that went to war

Gather round me people there's a story I would tell
About a brave young Indian you should remember well
From the land of the Pima Indian
A proud and noble band
Who farmed the Phoenix valley in Arizona land

Down the ditches for a thousand years
The water grew Ira's peoples' crops
'Till the white man stole the water rights
And the sparklin' water stopped

Now Ira's folks were hungry
And their land grew crops of weeds
When war came, Ira volunteered
And forgot the white man's greed

[CHORUS:]
Call him drunken Ira Hayes
He won't answer anymore
Not the whiskey drinkin' Indian
Nor the Marine that went to war

There they battled up Iwo Jima's hill,
Two hundred and fifty men
But only twenty-seven lived to walk back down again

And when the fight was over
And when Old Glory raised
Among the men who held it high
Was the Indian, Ira Hayes

[CHORUS:]
Call him drunken Ira Hayes
He won't answer anymore
Not the whiskey drinkin' Indian
Nor the Marine that went to war

Ira returned a hero
Celebrated through the land
He was wined and speeched and honored; Everybody shook his hand

But he was just a Pima Indian
No water, no crops, no chance
At home nobody cared what Ira'd done
And when did the Indians dance

[CHORUS:]
Call him drunken Ira Hayes
He won't answer anymore
Not the whiskey drinkin' Indian
Nor the Marine that went to war

Then Ira started drinkin' hard;
Jail was often his home
They'd let him raise the flag and lower it
like you'd throw a dog a bone!

He died drunk one mornin'
Alone in the land he fought to save
Two inches of water in a lonely ditch
Was a grave for Ira Hayes

[CHORUS:]
Call him drunken Ira Hayes
He won't answer anymore
Not the whiskey drinkin' Indian
Nor the Marine that went to war

Yeah, call him drunken Ira Hayes
But his land is just as dry
And his ghost is lyin' thirsty
In the ditch where Ira died

XO Loves,

Me

Running Away

In the last couple of years I've gone through some major life changes.  I've hit rock bottom and thought for the longest time that I'd never rise above it all.  Somewhere along the line though I grew up and before I knew it I'd changed.  I found myself again and with strong determination I found my path as well.  I haven't looked back and I can honestly say that there's very little in life I've ever regretted. 
I've worked hard to overcome my demons.  I'm much stronger and self assured than I was even two years ago.  I tried to forget, I tried crying it out, tried drinking the pain away, talked with a counselor and even tried outrunning the memories.  But here I am, 1,000 miles away from all the pain that I've ever endured and I'm forced to face it all again. 
Facebook is a gift and a curse.  I have very little cell service at my house and during the day I usually have none at all.  Thankfully I'm not on Facebook very often.  However, the last couple of weeks I've come face to face with names through friends that cause an immediate unwanted reaction.  It doesn't matter how many years have gone by,  even the simple mention of their names causes my heart to race and I falter between being angry and deeply sad.  It's worse at night because then my subconscious is left to deal with the heartache and pain, which usually leaves me exhausted and totally unsettled the next morning. 
I wish I was stronger.  I wish I could hear their names and see their pictures and feel nothing.  I wish I could be a cold hearted, uncaring, unemotional woman who has completely left her past behind her.  Try as I may I'll always be too emotional.  I'll always care too much and I'll always end up hurt.  Hiding out here in the desert where the deer population outnumbers the human sounds better and better.  They say time heals all wounds, but even the oldest of my wounds still slows me down. 
I'd have to say my favorite flower is cactus.  They are the true beauties of the desert, growing in otherwise impossible conditions.  They hold out until they have all they need then they grow the most beautiful flower.  Something so beautiful you wouldn't think you'd see it growing in sand where very little rain falls.  They're almost inspiring.  They make me feel like no matter how impossible life gets or how I feel that at some point I'll have all I'll need.  Someday I can grow into that beautiful flower and all will be right within my soul.  I dream and pray for that day.

XO Loves,

Me

This is one of my favorite poems by Robert Service.  He's one of my papa's favorite authors and we grew up listening to him read some of his favorites.  Just about every winter we get a storm that wipes out our power and after chores there's very little left to do but read and enjoy family time.  Often times during these cold, blustery evenings my papa would pull out a book and we always asked him to read The Cremation of Sam McGee.  I thought I'd share this little story with all of you just in case you've never had the pleasure.  If you don't feel like reading it, click HERE to listen to Hank Snow read it.  I got off work early today and it seems as though monsoon season has finally arrived.  The sound of pounding rain and the crack of thunder made me think of this story.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

The Cremation of Sam McGee

By Robert W. Service

There are strange things done in the midnight sun

      By the men who moil for gold;

The Arctic trails have their secret tales

      That would make your blood run cold;

The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,

      But the queerest they ever did see

Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge

      I cremated Sam McGee.

Now Sam McGee was from Tennessee, where the cotton blooms and blows.

Why he left his home in the South to roam 'round the Pole, God only knows.

He was always cold, but the land of gold seemed to hold him like a spell;

Though he'd often say in his homely way that "he'd sooner live in hell."

On a Christmas Day we were mushing our way over the Dawson trail.

Talk of your cold! through the parka's fold it stabbed like a driven nail.

If our eyes we'd close, then the lashes froze till sometimes we couldn't see;

It wasn't much fun, but the only one to whimper was Sam McGee.

And that very night, as we lay packed tight in our robes beneath the snow,

And the dogs were fed, and the stars o'erhead were dancing heel and toe,

He turned to me, and "Cap," says he, "I'll cash in this trip, I guess;

And if I do, I'm asking that you won't refuse my last request."

Well, he seemed so low that I couldn't say no; then he says with a sort of moan:

"It's the cursèd cold, and it's got right hold till I'm chilled clean through to the bone.

Yet 'tain't being dead—it's my awful dread of the icy grave that pains;

So I want you to swear that, foul or fair, you'll cremate my last remains."

A pal's last need is a thing to heed, so I swore I would not fail;

And we started on at the streak of dawn; but God! he looked ghastly pale.

He crouched on the sleigh, and he raved all day of his home in Tennessee;

And before nightfall a corpse was all that was left of Sam McGee.

There wasn't a breath in that land of death, and I hurried, horror-driven,

With a corpse half hid that I couldn't get rid, because of a promise given;

It was lashed to the sleigh, and it seemed to say: "You may tax your brawn and brains,

But you promised true, and it's up to you to cremate those last remains."

Now a promise made is a debt unpaid, and the trail has its own stern code.

In the days to come, though my lips were dumb, in my heart how I cursed that load.

In the long, long night, by the lone firelight, while the huskies, round in a ring,

Howled out their woes to the homeless snows— O God! how I loathed the thing.

And every day that quiet clay seemed to heavy and heavier grow;

And on I went, though the dogs were spent and the grub was getting low;

The trail was bad, and I felt half mad, but I swore I would not give in;

And I'd often sing to the hateful thing, and it hearkened with a grin.

Till I came to the marge of Lake Lebarge, and a derelict there lay;

It was jammed in the ice, but I saw in a trice it was called the "Alice May."

And I looked at it, and I thought a bit, and I looked at my frozen chum;

Then "Here," said I, with a sudden cry, "is my cre-ma-tor-eum."

Some planks I tore from the cabin floor, and I lit the boiler fire;

Some coal I found that was lying around, and I heaped the fuel higher;

The flames just soared, and the furnace roared—such a blaze you seldom see;

And I burrowed a hole in the glowing coal, and I stuffed in Sam McGee.

Then I made a hike, for I didn't like to hear him sizzle so;

And the heavens scowled, and the huskies howled, and the wind began to blow.

It was icy cold, but the hot sweat rolled down my cheeks, and I don't know why;

And the greasy smoke in an inky cloak went streaking down the sky.

I do not know how long in the snow I wrestled with grisly fear;

But the stars came out and they danced about ere again I ventured near;

I was sick with dread, but I bravely said: "I'll just take a peep inside.

I guess he's cooked, and it's time I looked"; ... then the door I opened wide.

And there sat Sam, looking cool and calm, in the heart of the furnace roar;

And he wore a smile you could see a mile, and he said: "Please close that door.

It's fine in here, but I greatly fear you'll let in the cold and storm—

Since I left Plumtree, down in Tennessee, it's the first time I've been warm."

There are strange things done in the midnight sun

      By the men who moil for gold;

The Arctic trails have their secret tales

      That would make your blood run cold;

The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,

      But the queerest they ever did see

Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge

      I cremated Sam McGee.

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XO Loves,


Me

The Cold Looks

The skin on my neck still burns from yesterday's sun as I lay uncomfortably in bed.  The silver moon peeking through the open window.  The air drifts in cool and clear from the recent shower.  1100 miles and a time zone separate me from home.  Behind me I've left family, friends, horses and dogs to pursue a career.  Grand ideas and dreams have led me to this sleepy little town.  On first glance it's beautiful, quaint and even homey.  But one doesn't just ignore the questioning looks, the uncertainty of being a "newcomer".  It's not my first time being an outsider, a new town, a new address.  A few offer tentative smiles, fewer offer introductions.  I can't hear the words but I know what they're saying; "Who is that?", "Why is she here?", "This is our town".  I'm from a small town, and I've lived and worked in others, but this town is different from the others.  It's difficult to respect horsemen who say nothing to a man riding an obviously crippled horse at a competitive event.  Shaking my head in disgust my opinion fell on deaf ears.  The excitement that built upon hearing about said event quickly dissipated in the face of a cold arrival.  I'm not afraid, I'm not about to let the whispers deter me from enjoying what this town has to offer.  Head up, shoulders back I left that arena with a stubborn confidence.  I graduated college looking for a challenge, seems as a simple seasonal I've already found it.  The full moon bathes my room in it's calming and serene light and not for the first time I wish I could bottle up the calmness that it always gives.

XO Loves,

Me

I'm an Ole Song

Here's one of my favorites by Royal Wade Kimes.  This is a truly wonderful, down to earth and genuine man.  My dad first heard his music a couple years ago on XM.  He ordered a few cd's, really liked what he heard and bought them all.  Apparently Wade likes to contact folks who buy his music, get feedback, chat and what have you.  My dad's quite a chatty fellow and they hit it off.  From time to time Wade calls my dad and they chat like long lost friends.  I think it's really neat that they've formed a friendship through a love of music and like mindedness.  I just love Wade's music, he's a lot like a modern day Marty Robbins.  So here's I'm an Ole Song by Royal Wade Kimes.  And here's a link to the video

I'm an ole song just hangin' around
I'm an ole song, wrote in this town
Talk about love, the living of life
I'm an ole song someone had to write

CH.

Talk about love, talk about pain
Talk about sunshine talk about rain
Helped that poor man down his lonely road
You can hear me on your radio
I can take you home, I'm A Ole Song

I'm An Ole Song I can be your freind
Down and out play me again
I'll dry your tears help you with your trials
I'm An Ole Song I can make you smile

Repeat Ch.

Tag

I can take you home I'm An Ole Song
I can take you home I'm An Ole Song

A Touching Story

Today I met an old man.  As kind of a fellow as ever I've met, his brother was the same.  (I may have a soft spot for old guys being as how I no longer have a grandpa of my own.)  These guys live in the town just to the south of us, 1 of only 4 in the county.  Today we helped them string a hot wire fence around a meadow to keep the cows from over grazing it anymore than it was.  I had the luxury of getting to chat with them several times throughout the day.  But as we were wrapping things up I got a truly special treat.

I don't know what caused the man to tell me, a stranger such a special story but I feel so blessed that he felt he could share.  I had caught him on several occasions gazing at the rocky outcropping on the other side of the canyon.  On a trip by with some fence testers he stopped me with an unbelievable tale that brought tears to my eyes.

Somewhere on near 40 years ago, his memory isn't what it used to be, was the year his father was killed.  He was out riding the canyon checking on cows.  He'd been depressed over losing his father and overwhelmed with having inherited the ranch.  The day was incredibly cloudy, the sun completely hidden from view.  When all of a sudden the clouds broke and a ray of sunshine lit on a rock.  There on the rock stood a man in white, his feet not touching anything.  He faced the man on the horse but stood pointing towards home.  The man knew his wife was further down the canyon and rushed to find her so he could show her this miracle.  He watched the man in white all the while.  When he finally reached his wife the sun was gone and so was the man.  In his heart he knew that was his father.

By this time tears were streaming quietly down my face and I couldn't have talked if I'd wanted to.  I couldn't process the enormity of what I had just heard.  How amazing!  When I could finally talk again I told him that must have been an incredibly special moment for him.  That it's unfathomable that people can not believe in anything when you hear stories like that.  I could tell from his expression that that moment was forever seared into his memory.  One final goodbye.  I still get teary eyed thinking about it.

The fact that this man whom I'd only just met felt comfortable enough with me to share something so special cemented within me that I'm doing what I should be doing.  I know we all wish to make a difference in life.  It's my goal to bridge a gap that some see as unattainable.  It could just be my ego, but I think that old man respected me for working right along with the men all day.  I don't have to change the opinions of thousands, but if I can make a change for the positive in a few I've done more than most.

Xo Loves,

Me

Home

Where are you from?  Where do you call home?

Such an easy question can at times be difficult to answer.  When I was younger in the span of 3 years, I had moved 9 times.  Good thing I had a PO Box, because that would have been a lot of address changes.  I used to joke that I never got called in for jury duty because they could never track me down, but seriously it's probably true.  Most recently I moved to Utah from Oregon.  Most of my animals are in California, the majority of my belongings are in Oregon, the necessities here with me in Utah.  Where am I from you ask?  I guess I don't know.  I think it's a Jason Boland song that says, "I have a harmless habit of being fine wherever I am".  That pretty much sums up my life.

Yesterday I called to try and get internet at my house.  He needed an address, only I truly do not have one.  We don't pay our own utilities, just a flat rate to the government which comes out of our checks.  There's no address on the agreement I signed and we can't get mail here.  The man asked if I could ask a neighbor.  Umm, if I don't have an address I probably don't have neighbors either.  He really couldn't understand the concept.

One of my roommates constantly complains of being bored, granted she also doesn't have a car having flown here from the East Coast. I have yet to feel that way.  Quite the contrary, I've felt rushed for time since I got here.  Having so much to get done each day that I rarely go to bed on time.  Of course I can probably count on 2 hands the number of times I've truly been bored in life.  I'm easily amused.  I've been here for almost 2 weeks now and it still feels like a dream.  I can't get over the fact that I finally graduated and now have 3 degrees.  I'm getting spoiled by the high country, where 85 is considered hot.  Try as I may, I can't avoid the effect of the sun.  Slowly deepening the color of my skin. My hands haven't been this dark in years.  I love it all.

 I fully embrace the old saying, "Home is where you hang your hat".

Xo Loves,

Me

500 Miles

This song is such a great one!  Going along with my theme of oldies, here's 500 Miles by Bobby Bare.  It's another song from the 1960's and last summer it became one of my favorites because one of my family's favorite artists Royal Wade Kimes re-did it on a new album of his.  The original is definitely a goody though.  I hope you enjoy!  For whatever reason I can't get the video to link, so copy and paste this url if  you'd like to listen to it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pv31UsxdHZw

I'm 500 miles away from home

Teardrops fell on mama's note
When I read the thing she wrote
She said, "We miss you son
We love you, come on home"

Well I didn't have to pack
I had it all right on my back
Now I'm 500 miles away from home

Away from home, away from home
Cold and tired and all alone
Yes I'm 500 miles away from home

I know this is the same road
I took the day I left home
But it sure looks different now
Well I guess I look different too

'Cause time changes everything
I wonder what they'll say
When they see their boy looking this way
Oh I wonder what they'll say when I get home

Can't remember when I ate
It's just thumb and walk and wait
And I'm still 500 miles away from home

If my luck had been just right
I'd be with them all tonight
But I'm still 500 miles away from home

Away from home, away from home
Cold and tired and all alone
Yes I'm still 500 miles away from home
Oh I'm still 500 miles

XO Loves,

Me

Skip a Rope

Last weekend on my school for a field trip it must have been oldie's day on the radio because the song Skip a Rope by Henson Cargill came on. I faintly remember hearing this song when I was little(no I wasn't born yet) only I clearly didn't remember the lyrics.  This song came out in 1967 and was Cargill's only No. 1 hit, where it remained for 5 weeks.  I think it's a got a pretty cool message, especially for those times.  So here's the lyrics as best I could find them, and HERE'S the link for the video.

Skip a rope skip a rope
Oh listen to the children while they play
Now ain't it kinda funny what the children say
Skip a rope

Daddy hates mommy mommy hates dad
Last night you should've heard the fight they had
It gave little sister another bad dream
She woke us all up with a terrible scream

Skip a rope skip a rope...

Cheat on your taxes don't be a fool
Now what was that they said about the golden rule
Never mind the rule just play to win
And hate your neighbor for the shade of his skin

Skip a rope skip a rope...

Stub 'em in the back that's the name of the game
And mommy and daddy are who's to blame

Skip a rope skip a rope
Just listen to your children while they play
It's really not very funny what the children say
Skip a rope skip a rope
Skip a rope skip a rope

XO Loves,


Me

Skip a rope, skip a rope
Oh, listen to the children while they play
Ain't it kind of funny what the children say?
Skip a rope

Daddy hates mommy, mommy hates dad
Last night you should have heard the fight they had
It gave little sister another bad dream
She woke us all up with a terrible scream

Skip a rope, skip a rope
Oh, listen to the children while they play
Ain't it kind of funny what the children say?

Skip a rope

Cheat on your taxes don't be a fool
What was that they said about the golden rule?
Never mind the rules, just play to win
And hate your neighbor for the shade of his skin

Skip a rope, skip a rope
Oh, listen to the children while they play
Ain't it kind of funny what the children say?
Skip a rope

Stab 'em in the back that's the name of the game
And mommy and daddy are who's to blame

Skip a rope, skip a rope Listen to the children as they play;
It's really not very funny what the children say. Skip a rope
Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/henson-cargill/skip-a-rope-lyrics/#1TtFSb0AhF61fUBr.99

Skip a rope, skip a rope
Oh, listen to the children while they play
Ain't it kind of funny what the children say?
Skip a rope

Daddy hates mommy, mommy hates dad
Last night you should have heard the fight they had
It gave little sister another bad dream
She woke us all up with a terrible scream

Skip a rope, skip a rope
Oh, listen to the children while they play
Ain't it kind of funny what the children say?

Skip a rope

Cheat on your taxes don't be a fool
What was that they said about the golden rule?
Never mind the rules, just play to win
And hate your neighbor for the shade of his skin

Skip a rope, skip a rope
Oh, listen to the children while they play
Ain't it kind of funny what the children say?
Skip a rope

Stab 'em in the back that's the name of the game
And mommy and daddy are who's to blame

Skip a rope, skip a rope Listen to the children as they play;
It's really not very funny what the children say. Skip a rope
Read more at http://www.songlyrics.com/henson-cargill/skip-a-rope-lyrics/#1TtFSb0AhF61fUBr.99

Pendleton, OR

I'm sure everyone has that town.  That one great town they love/loved visiting or living in.  Of course this really only applies if you've traveled or moved much.  I chose to go to college a long way from home and in that journey found the only other town that's ever truly felt like home.  That town for me is Pendleton, OR. 

I remember when I moved there the first time, it was Round-Up week.  How could you move to Pendleton for school and not go to the Round-Up?  Greatest show I've ever seen, I've since been 5 more times.  My papa and I went to the second night of the PBR and the first day of the actual rodeo.  It is really something during the national anthem to have fighter jets fly overhead.  For those of you who have never been or don't know much about it, it's a PRCA rodeo that lasts a week.  The town swells from about 16,000 to 75,000.  Motels are packed, trailers and tents are parked and tucked away everywhere.  They completely block off Main Street for vendors and shows.  There are tents full of goods all around the Round-Up grounds and you can't forget about the tribal village that's set up behind the arena.  My favorite is always the fry bread, but they have such beautiful jewelry and other assorted goods for sale too.  Guess what I'm getting at is you really want to bring a lot of spending money.  One of our first stops was Hamley's.  It really meant a lot to my papa who has ridden Hamley saddles his entire life.  The store had had a devastating fire years ago and opened once again the week before we got there.  In the 60's my papa ordered a custom saddle for around $300, nowadays they cost at least 10 times that.  Some may say they're nothing special, but then again they've probably never ridden a Hamley ;) .

I was 18 that year and even though I'd been to Cow Palace, I'd never seen such an event.  My dad and I strolled down Main St. one night and watched the festivities since I clearly couldn't go to the bars.  I remember watching a guy get hypnotized and think he was Brittney Spears, later we'd become friends.  The all time highlight though was a cowboy, he was a roper, who rode his horse into Crabby's Underground Saloon.  My dad and I got quite a kick out of it and just knew the bouncer was sure to kick him right out.  Shortly he did indeed come back out, but only to let his horse do what he needed to do.  All be damned if they didn't let him and his horse stay in the bar!  I knew right then that that town was going to be awesome.

It didn't disappoint.  I made lots of friends, met tons of people, drank copious amounts of beer and in general partied like a little rock-star.  It was great!  I even got to ride my horse in the Round-Up arena at NIRA finals.  True to the laws of life it wasn't all rainbows and glitter, but boy do I look back on those years fondly.  I experienced life to it's fullest and I never wanted to leave.  Unfortunately the college is only a Junior College, so eventually it all came to an end.  I'm pretty sure my graduating class was the end of an epic era.  When I went back the parties weren't near as big and groups became more cliquish. Now don't assume all I did was party.  I continued to get excellent grades, oddly enough we all rushed to do homework as soon as it was assigned so that we had more time to well basically screw off. 

From September of 2005 to December of 2008 I lived in 9 different houses.  One place I only lived in for a month, my boxes never left the porch or got unpacked.  After that my best friend and I paid $200 apiece for the luxury of a blow up mattress on the floor of our roommates bedroom.  We were very mobile at this point in our lives.  I only lived in Pendleton one summer, the other two were spent in CA and Mt. Vernon.  This year when my parents brought me back to La Grande for my final year of college we got to talking.  Even though I haven't lived in Pendleton for years and I've been here for the last 2, Pendleton still feels more like home than La Grande ever has.  Last week I had to take my trailer over for an alignment.  Friday when I picked it up I decided to run some errands.  I spent probably an hour on Main St talking to different business owners.  As I was leaving I ran into the guy who worked on my trailer and chatted with him for a second.  Whether or not these people remembered me or even knew me at all they were friendly.  People just aren't that friendly on this side of the mountain.  Every time I drop down off of Cabbage Hill my soul quiets.  It's like I can breathe easy and I just feel so at home.  A sense of comfort and confidence instantly rolls over me.  I don't know if I'll ever get to live in Pendleton again, or if it's really where I should be anymore.  But I'll always love it and the friends I still have there and the folks who've become like family will always hold a special place in my heart. 

Adrian Buckaroogirl has a song I'm Leaving Nevada, and when I left Pendleton in 2011 this song really rang true.  "This damn truck is taking me away from where I belong", that's exactly how I felt.  I literally cried.  Even though I knew I had to move due to health issues it didn't make it any better.  I may be 50 miles east now but I'm still close enough to make day trips and visit when I want to.  In June I'm moving to Utah and in the fall when my job is done I'll move back home.  It saddens my heart to not know when I'll get to come back. 

XO Loves,

Me

You Can't Hold Me Back

Like so many new songs I've discovered I found this little gem on Spotify.  While these beautiful ladies are not new comers by any stretch, they are new to me.  Sweethearts of the Rodeo are two sisters, Janis Oliver and Kristine Arnold and they debuted in 1986 with Hey Doll Baby.  Their last record was released 17 years ago because they chose to put their career on hold while they raised their families and enjoyed their lives.

I absolutely love You Can't Hold Me Back!  So many women settle for a lesser love all in the name of fulfilling "the dream" but end up unhappy and ultimately unfulfilled.  I had what I thought was the ultimate love but if I were still in that relationship I wouldn't be where I am today.  I wouldn't have had the chance to learn how to cut meat, or a few extra years spent with my family.  I certainly wouldn't be about to move several states away for work.  I would have graduated on time but in doing so have missed out on all of the great things I've done in that time period.  Even though I try my best to keep attention off of me I tend to stand out.  Whether it be my loud voice, infectious laugh or the fact that I fall a lot, somehow I end up sticking out in a crowd.  "Because I'm a white rose blooming in a field of red".  Isn't that such a fantastic line?  I apologize for not being able to find the lyrics but here's a video of them singing live, so I hope you enjoy.  Check out their CD Restless I think it's a good one. 

XO Loves,

Me

A Feelin' Like That

Gary Allan.  What can I say, I love his music.  I love his voice and his songs have a way of really touching home.  When this song first came out I couldn't get enough of it.  Don't you know it was my ringtone!  I listened to it all the time, such a fantastic song.  Then life went along and I didn't hear it on the radio anymore and I kind of forgot about it, until it popped up on Spotify.  It was as if my love affair started completely anew.  I've been a touch lax lately on my Song of the Week posts, so what a better way to start again than with a long lost fav.  So here you are my pretties, Gary Allan's A Feelin' Like That.

I stepped out into the blue
Felt the wind hit my face
Before my shoot opened I felt my heart race
I was fallin
Oh that's just fallin

Off the coast of Australia
I dove way down deep
For all that I saw of that Great Barrier Reef
It was nothin
Compared to you it was nothin

[Chorus]
I got Lightning in my veins
thunder in my chest.
all tangled up with you and tryin to catch my breath
I've been chasing that sensation half way
around the world and lookin' back
on what we had.
I've done it all I've seen it all but I can't find a feelin' like that.


I wound up in some town in Spain
runnin with the bulls
Tryin to catch another thrill with a thousand other fools
We were runnin
Ah but that's just runnin
when I started pushin 30
it started pushin back
Well how was I to know till now you'd be such a hard act to follow
Nothin seems to follow

[chorus]
I got Lightning in my veins
thunder in my chest.
all tangled up with you and tryin to catch my breath
I've been chasing that sensation half way
around the world and lookin' back
on what we had.
I've done it all I've seen it all but I can't find a feelin' like that.

It's like flyin down some back road at midnight
with you eyes closed and the head lights off
Your life is searchin everywhere can't find that feelin' anywhere
Your all I want, now all I want is that...

Lightning in my veins
thunder in my chest.
all tangled up with you and tryin to catch my breath
I've been chasing that sensation half way
around the world and lookin back
on what we have.
I've done it all I've seen it all but I can't find a feelin' like that.

That's right I've done it all
I've seen it all but I can't find a feelin' like that



XO Loves,

Me

A Rainy Day at Home

Today I cried a little.  I hate that I can be so emotional, I've always felt it was a complete setback.  Some may agree it is, others may think it's endearing while others still just don't understand it.  I find myself on the verge of tears whenever something touches my heart.  Whether it be a touching movie, talking about a lost pet, a lost friend or just my family in general I find myself literally getting choked up over nothing.  I didn't used to be this way.  In fact as a child I remember rarely crying at funerals of beloved family members.  It's as though all those emotionless years are now catching up with me and making up for lost time. 

I felt like crap today.  It was similar to a wicked hangover only without the nausea, I couldn't breathe and it felt like an elephant had taken up residence on my chest.  All I wanted was my mum's.  I laid pathetically in my bed just about all day, getting up only to let my dogs out.  Finally I decided I needed to eat so I left home in search of sustenance.  I just wanted to listen to my music loud and as La Roux blasted through my speakers I couldn't help but think about another time.  A little over a year ago when her CD was all I listened to as I mourned the loss of my best friend.  I'm not sure why out of all of the CD's I have in my pickup her's was the one I chose, there was no meaning behind it, we'd never listened to it.  In fact he probably wouldn't have even liked her.  Two years ago I chose to come back to school and finish my degree.  The loss of my best friend felt even greater as I came back to his old stomping grounds. 

He was a great guy.  One of the first friend's I made when I started college.  He had the best parties and they were known as such far and wide.  He was always there for me, through the dark and the light.  Whether I needed an encouraging word, a drive in the mountains or a beer he was always there somehow knowing exactly what I needed.  He occasionally lost his way over the years, but he had a good heart and always found his way back.  The hardest part about crying over him is that if only he were still here he's the first one I'd call to help stop this nonsense.  His death was untimely of course and I haven't dealt well even though it's been two years.  I still clearly remember the day my friend called to tell me he was gone.  I had moved home and we hadn't talked in awhile I'd been thinking about giving him a call to catch up.  The opportunity lost and I couldn't even attend his funeral.  I never got to say good-bye to the one man I had a truly uncomplicated relationship with.  He was laid to rest in ancestral lands and I'm bound and determined to say good-bye to him before I leave in June.  Visiting his grave will be incredibly real and even though I know he's gone that cold gray stone will drive it home.  I've lost a lot of family, people I loved and cherished for years but for some reason I felt his death much stronger than any other.  He was my go to guy, my problem solver, my good time friend.  He was a colorful man and touched so many lives, my heart breaks for the three little kids he left behind.  So many memories, so many crazy stories, so many good times.  I hope he knows how truly special he was and always will be to me. 

XO Loves,

Me

Gary Allan and Dark Skies

"I know I must be going, cause love's already gone.  And all I'm taking with me are the pieces of my heart and all I'll leave are smoke rings in the dark."

So many new changes are coming my way and I finally feel like the young lady I always wanted to be someday.  I just finished my final winter term of college and my mama came up for a little visit.  Since I chose to go to university 11 hours away from home I don't see my family very often.  My papa wanted to come too but there was too much to be done in preparation for summer haying.  Even though I don't live in a small town compared to my hometown, it doesn't offer much in the way of amenities.  If you want to go to a mall or do any real shopping you have to go to Idaho or Washington.  We chose Tri-Cities in WA and just had a blast.  We watched a movie went to a nice restaurant, did a little shopping where my mama got her first smartphone and managed to not get lost once. 

Both coming and going we went through Pendleton, which for those of you who don't know I lived there for 3 years.  While there I made several lasting friendships, fell in love and experienced life as every young college kid should.  The difference between La Grande and Pendleton though is that Pendleton truly felt like home.  I've been fortunate in that everywhere I go I seem to find a family that adopts me, which makes being hundreds of miles away from home so much easier.  Maybe it's that I was more social while in Pendleton but no matter how long I've been away my soul feels an instant calm when I drop down into town.  Graduation is quickly approaching and I'll be moving soon, which means I don't know when I'll be back.  It's ok though, I'll always have the memories.

This morning I got a call from a Range Manager in Colorado, first wondering if I'd accepted another position yet and second if I had time for an interview.  An hour later I was sealing the deal on a Range Technician position in Yampa, CO.  It's a sleepy little town of 300, nestled in the heart of the Rockies, elevation 7,800.  I'm so excited!  I worked 2 summers in SE Colorado several years back and I can't express the joy I feel over being able to go back.  The best part is that even though it's small it's only 25 miles to Steamboat Springs which is quite a bit bigger and sounds like where I'll be doing my primary shopping.  In my opinion it's a sign of a good job when one of your interview questions is if you can drive a manual transmission and pull a trailer.  I love adventure and the Rockies are absolutely beautiful.  The high elevation can be a killer but I swear you feel better, even if your lungs do feel like they may explode with any real exertion.  I'll be living in the barracks with the other seasonals and if all goes according to plan I'll be taking 2 horses with me.  What else can a girl ask for? 

Tonight the skies steadily grew darker, Gary Allan sang to my soul through my Bose speakers.  As the wind picked up and the music grew louder I felt like I was living a dream.  I felt heady and light hearted as thought this life I'm living was not my own.  I may not be exactly where I planned to be 5 years ago, but I'm in a good place.  Life is looking up, new opportunities are all about me and I fully intend on making the best of every one of them.  I've given up on trying to plan my future.  I have a fair idea but the actual planning is not mine to make and the spontaneous nature of it all is something I crave.  Make sure to check back this summer because I should have some grand tales and fabulous photo's to share!

How stinkin' cute is this little town???!!!

XO Loves,

Me

 

Anticipation

I'm up late frantically trying to finish up a scientific paper for my plant physiology class.  It's not due until Monday but tomorrow is the last day to have our professor review it for us.  Not only is this class super hard but there's only 90 points possible and this paper is worth a third of our grade!  I've got most of it done though.
While I'm working I'm listening to my favorite list on Spotify, which includes a lot of Brenn Hill, Ian Tyson and Chris LeDoux.  It's really got my soul stirring.  For the last couple of weeks I've been applying to Range Tech jobs throughout the West.  So far I've had a call back on a job in the Dakotas and a job in Utah.  The stress and anticipation is almost too much to bare.  I've applied for a lot of jobs, there's still more I haven't gotten to, and more being posted weekly.  All of these jobs are 6 month temporary jobs, but rather than being disappointed I'm thrilled.  It gives me a chance to gain the experience I need in order to apply for a higher grade level as well as allows me the opportunity to work who knows where!  Also, my 5 year plan may or may not involve a season working as a jillaroo in Australia.  The thought of being tied down and restrained in one town right now gives me heartburn.  I'm young, I'm graduating in 4 months and other than my myriad of animals, nothing is holding me back!
For those of you reading this from another state, I just may be coming to your town soon.

XO Loves,

Me

Distraction

The rains pouring down, beating against the weak sides of my little house.  The dripping in the window sill so loud I think it's leaking.  The already saturated ground can hold no more, the water pools and runs downhill.  It was snowing just yesterday.  It seems my awful luck has struck again.  The weather has been beautiful during the weekdays, and wintery and dismal on the weekends.  Between school and work I'm stuck inside Monday-Friday.  The weekends are mine though.  Unfortunately this weekend I had too much homework to catch up on and I didn't get my usual weekend pleasure.  I doubt my ponies mind much, they must feel like they've hit the jackpot.  They haven't had to work in a week and they get to eat all day long.  I did get my newly acquired first edition of Nerve by Dick Francis read though, so it hasn't been a complete loss.  Reading about riding is almost as good as riding right?  Especially when it's the high-stakes game of steeple-chasing?

I sit here taking pleasure in the sound of the rain hitting my window and clicking of the keys as I type.  So much reading to do; investment analysis, enterprise analysis, the cost of environmental services in South America.  I think my window sill really is leaking.  I've been couped up all day and I'm finding it very hard to concentrate.  My black dog lays contentedly alongside my computer.  His long hair obscuring the side of my screen.

Only 3 more weeks until Spring Break and only 11 weeks after that until I graduate.  This is my last eighth week of winter term.  The end is so close that I'm in a constant state of giddiness.  15 more weeks as a student.  Then I'm free!  No longer will I be staying up late at night reading things that really don't interest me.  No longer will I have to stress over time management when it comes to class, homework and work.  I'm almost done.  I can do this.  Now if I could just get some riding time in...

XO Loves,


Me

With a Whisper

Brenn Hill has quickly become one of my favorite artists.  I first heard his music while listening to a random playlist on Slacker and I've been hooked ever since.  In fact I moved from Pendleton the last time just before he had a show at Hamley's.  I was very disappointed!  I love his voice, and unlike so many mainstream artist's these days his songs actually tell a story.  I also enjoy that they're cowboy songs.  If you have Spotify here's a link that will allow you to listen to it.  Here's one of my favorites, With a Whisper. 

With A Whisper
Brenn Hill/Red Cliffs Press Music (BMI)
Verse 1:
Show me the ways of horsemen
Rope halter, snaffle, and bosal
Screw me down tight on the buckers
I wanna ride this colt through hell
Tell me the Roughrider's secrets
How to 9-1-1 your latigo
To cross her feet in a tussle
When to hang on when to let go
Chorus:
You are a modern contradiction
You hold to the ways of yesterday
You wooly buckaroo
I wish I was you
You say all there is to say
With a whisper
Verse 2:
Soft-mouthed and always lookin' for you
I see obedience in her eye
Her ears are ever-leanin' forward
Between the desert and the sky
With a fancy wild-rag 'round your neck
Jingle-bobs are singin' outta tune
Just you and her until the sun sets
Here upon the far Owyhee moon
Repeat Chorus
Verse 3:
Show me the ways of horsemen
Rope halter,snaffle, and bosal
Teach me the Roughrider's secrets
I wanna ride this colt through hell

Wild Animals

Have you ever stopped and truly thought about how hard wild animals work to survive?  They endure extreme heat, extreme cold, droughts, floods, monsoons, fires and other assorted natural disasters.  They're hunted, exploited, chased, harassed and relocated.  The overpopulation of humans has had a drastic affect on wildlife worldwide.

Every creature, big or small, cute or scary has a purpose and a story.  We may not always like or appreciate their lot in life, but they're here and we need to live with them.  Sometimes I think even through all their hardships, they really are better off.  Animal life is simple.  A hierarchy exists among every species that dwells together.  There's no lying, no deception amongst the ranks.  You're put in your place by your superior and that's that.  There's a constant battle for supremacy, but it's expected and the alpha always knows it's coming.  One day they will no longer be able to protect what is theirs.  When that day comes they leave, dead or alive.

The life of a wild animal is hard.  Whether it's an endangered black rhino in Africa being hunted for it's horn, a mama cheetah doing her best to defy cub survival rates, elk herds fighting off wolves or fish searching for colder waters.  Every day is uncertain, a constant risk, a battle for life.  Most people only see wild animals once their captured, or through the lens of someone else' experience.  We make jokes about observing some creature "in it's natural habitat".  Those of us who are lucky enough to see wildlife I think most often take it for granted.

Two falls ago I saw a timber rattlesnake for the first time, one of a pair.  The next day I saw a king snake, he proved too quick for my camera skills and I never did get a good shot of it.  Last fall I saw what was either a marten or a fisher.  Neither my dad or I had ever seen one before.  I gawk in amazement when I see big bucks.  I wonder at the athleticism and grace of elk.  I'm unusually afraid of  mountain lions (I used to have nightmares about them jumping through my window and eating me as a child), but their the ultimate predator.  Lithe, graceful, quick, strong and effective.

People who have grown up in the country learn from a young age to respect all animals.  When I was little I was always told that animals came first, and they always ate before I did. The true stewards of the land learn to live and make peace with all animals.  I had a great-uncle of sorts that spent most of the year in a camper in the mountains.  He was so unbelievably a part of the landscape.  He just sat in his little lawn chair quietly reading for hours and hours.  He made pets of deer and squirrels and chipmunks.  He was so accepted by his surroundings that one night he was awoken by a bull elk rubbing on the side of his camper!  He didn't have much and he was far from a materialistic man.  Sometimes I think he had the right idea. 

Anyway, this is no way is an ode to environmentalism.  Nor is it an attack on human kind.  I was just doing some research for a class and came across some fantastic photos shot for National Geographic.  Thought I'd share some with you.  They actually came from the Photo of the Day and I encourage you to check them out, the photo's are outstanding!  Here's the link.

XO Loves,


Me

Bang a Drum

How many of you have heard Chris LeDoux's song Bang a Drum?  It's a beautiful song and is actually a duet with Jon Bon Jovi.  Do you ever have reminiscent memories of what you were doing the first time you heard a certain song?  I do, a lot.  For me most of the time I was reading a book.  I can remember listening to this album and song while reading a book from the Sackett series by Louis L'Amour.  Love those Sackett men.  You should check out those books too by the way.  So here's Bang a Drum by Chris LeDoux and Bon Jovi.  Watch the video HERE


I went to see the preacher
To teach me how to pray
He looked at me and smiled
Then that preacher turned away

Said, "If you want to tell him something
You ain't gotta fold your hands
Say it with your heart, your soul and believe it
And I'll say, Amen"

Bang a drum for the sinners
Bang a drum for your sins
Bang a drum for the losers
And those who win

Bang a drum, bang it loudly
Or as soft as you need
Bang a drum for yourself, son
And a drum for me

Well, I called upon my brother
Just the other day
He said, "Jon, I'm gonna die
If I don't start to live again"

"I work each day and night like clockwork
Just tryin' to make ends meet
Well, I could kick this bad world's ass
If I could just get on my feet"

Bang a drum for the dyin'
Bang a drum for the truth
Bang a drum for the innocence
Lost in our youth

Bang a drum, bang it loudly
Or as soft as you need
Bang a drum for your brother
And a drum for me

I don't know where
All the rivers run
I don't know how far
I don't know how come

But I'm gonna die believin'
With each step that I take
Ain't worth the ground that I walk
If we don't walk it our own way

I don't claim to be a wise man
A poet or a saint
Just another man who's searchin'
For a better way

But, my heart beats loud as thunder
For the things that I believe
Sometimes, I want to run for cover
Sometimes, I want to scream

Bang a drum for the tomorrow
Bang a drum for the past
Bang a drum for the heroes
Who won't come back

Bang a drum for the promise
Bang a drum for the lies
Bang a drum for the lovers
And the tears they cry

Bang a drum, bang it loudly
Or as soft as you need
But as long as my heart
Keeps on banging, I've got a reason to believe


XO Loves,


Me