Lies & Frustration

I remember several things from when I was little. 
1. Always look people in the eye when being chastized
2. Never betray a loved one's trust, because once destroyed, it's near impossible to re-gain.

The first lesson has served me quite well.  Throughout my childhood, many adults have been taken aback at my direct eye contact during uncomfotable situations.  Apparently they expected to see another hang-dog dejected child with eyes lowered to the ground...

The second I've always felt is the most important lesson in life.  My papa taught me to be loyal until betrayed.  And that's just what I've done.  Many times I've dug in my heels, backing up a friend.  Defending their position on any issue.  Very rarely have I taken the correct side in those issues :s  While being trustworthy, honest and loyal, I apparently am also extremely gullible.

It's my main source of frustration.  What kind of friend or lover sabotages a pure trust?  After many "break-ups", (not all of the romantic sort) I've become wary and distrusting of most.  To the point where I may have subconsciously pushed away the love of my life.  I'm not sure when the loyal, trusting little girl, lost her faith in humanity.  It seems like now I tend to distrust before I trust.  I'm not completely jaded mind you, I do have some good friends, and always good family!  But the children of my general generation have mostly lost the morals and values of old.  Nowadays, lies and deceit are more commonly expected than truth and honesty.  It's amazing that I've actually lost friends because I expected them to be honest with me.  Can you believe that???

Since my last 'mistake', I've done some reading.  And misunderstanding seems to be the cause of most lies.  One party simply doesn't know how to convey their feelings to the other.  A type of panic sets in, and complete idiocy comes out, rather than the truth.  Then when either, or both parties become upset, words are spoken in anger and haste.  It is true that words are just words.  And we commonly say hurtful things to those we love in an effort to hurt them like they've hurt us.

This is a very toxic tactic for any relationship.  But unfortunately, very common.  How do we change this disasterous downward trend?  I believe that marriages 120 years ago were more successful due to the respect men had for women.  We were reveered, loved, cherished and praised.  We were the givers of life and therfore demanded respect.  Divorce wasn't an option and not something taken lightly.

I'm not adverse to divorce these days.  Sometimes we simply make the wrong decision that day at the alter.  But it all comes back to men not fully respecting women.  If either side wouldn't lie or play games, the business of ultimate trust would be much easier indeed!

So come now, it's easy, as simple as telling the truth....  Will we ever have the luxary of being the loyal trusting little girls we once were???

You will know the truth
and the truth will set
you free.
John 8:32

That's all for now my pretties

XO

Me